2 comments Saturday, March 31, 2007

Ladies and Gentlemen and Boys and Girls may I present to you the new Law that is known to define, control and explain all the randomness of the hermeneutics of the post-industrial society influenced by the conscious collapse of the hyper-structures that were formed in a pre-postmodernist era. .... The Burphys Law.

Official definition: "If you are really craving to have a Burphy, then it will be right in front of you but you would not have any cash in your pocket. Even if at that point of time you Best-est-est friend happens to meet you, he would ahve forgotten his wallet at home."

If there is any situation in which u feel that this theory has failed you must realize that it is the inability of your teeni-meeni brain to comprehend and/or appreciate the Truth.

It was merely chance I could beautifully "see " this theory during a research that I was doing. (Doesnt that remind me of the discovery of Microwaves?? ;) )

0 comments Tuesday, March 27, 2007

I am humbled by the enormous response to my blog. 17 Hits in one day (Including the 7, where I literally forced people to visit my site, at gun point, + 5, my own visits ).

Jab se counter lagaya hai mera Dil phoola nahin sama raha hai..

Therfore, Now Aap Blogger Bhaiyya Orkut pe bhi mil sakte hain

http://www.orkut.com/Home.aspx?xid=7799608703966610839


Aur to Aur Blogger Bhaiyya Ke Club ki membership भी ओपन hain..Jaldi kijiye offer सीमित hain..

http://www.orkut.com/Community.aspx?cmm=29726673


Dhanyavaad .. Bhaiyon aur unki bhenon...

Q ?
4 comments Monday, March 26, 2007

The trouble, Ques that one often faces a number of times.
Ek taraf kuan hai aur Ek taraf Kahai.

Taking a decision at the spur of the moment is a must. One decision makes me look like an aggressive, josh-mein-hosh-khone-vaala guy, and the other makes me feel stupid about myself.
You may accuse me of being a phatu or may praise me for doing the obvious. But, that doesn't really help, the guilt feeling (however minimal) does linger around for sometime.

The decision, I take, is usually based on some prejudices, maybe right or wrong. I know any normal girl would not want it happening and would want to oppose it. But most of them have so comfortably reconciled to the fact that it is "normal" enough to even oppose it. And in my case the usual main factor is the look on her face which invariably is I-am-soo-uncomfortable-But-I-am-not-gonna-raise-my-voice, which automatically means I will try and ignore "it" too.

From personal experiences I understand that if women raise their voices in public, at that moment, the public does care of the predator. Ironically most of the men who beat the man would themselves be such perverts, but ofcourse behti Ganga mein to sabh hi haat dhote hain.

In the mean time, I am not going to risk my ass to save urs.
As they say "Bhaiyya Helps those who Help themselves".

5 comments Monday, March 19, 2007

Feeling blue when I see Indians play.
Feeling green when Bangladeshis plays.


That might not be the most mellifluous song around. Definitely, not a chartbuster either , par...

Par mein Seeta Aur Geeta pe haath rakh kar Kasam khata hun ki yeh ..
yeh Sach Hai Sach ke Siva kuch nahin..


I never thought "we" would have a reason to feel jealous of Bangladeshi cricket fans???(U can notice, I still am in a state of shock !!! Please Bear with me ) Ya, I know Banglas plays/played well/unbelievably well, the team is full of surprises (remember it defeated Australia). But, this match was over in the first 5 overs, it was pathetic and over and above that : check this out. Talk about hosle buland hona (Ch%$$i Chiirna).

In spite of not being much of an Indian-team-lover, I decided to follow the world cup with full sincerity (Needless to mention, it ain't happening now). Pata nahin why do I even try.

Well as Greg Chappal says lets not Cry over Spilled milk (what if, the whole Cow Spills over???)

The Question now is: To Blue or To Not the Blue.

Surprise Surprise!!!!

Baba BloggerDev ki Bhavishyawaani 1 : If India clears Round 1, the World Cup is ours.
Baba BloggerDev ki Bhavishyawaani 2 : India will defeat SriLanka in Round 1.

I am not an eternal optimist. When Team-India was losing the match I was not sad. Not because I thought that the Bastards were paying the price for not practising and wasting their time modelling for everthing from Chaddis to Mercs (OK... Maybe Not only because....) but because I knew the consequences. Hamse apni Team ki performance Bardash nahin hogi aur hum tod phod jaroor karnge..

Aur phir...


Feelin' fine! Sublime!
When that smile of yours creeps into my mind

Oh oh

Nobody told me you'd feel so good
Nobody said you'd be so beautiful
Nobody warned me about your smile
You're the light, you're the light

When I close my eyesI'm colour blind
You make me colour blind




P.S.:

Just before u leavecheck this ..

Strengths: One of the world's great batting line-ups. One just can't write off Sehwag, Dravid, Tendulkar and Ganguly


and Did I forget to ask.. What was Sehwag( + 100 pounds of belly - hair on the head ) doing in the team?

0 comments

So, finally now I have seen KANK (Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehana). And also, the truth behind the failure of the movie is Out. Karan Johar said (on Next Gen, Shweta Nanda) :

" The Role was Initially carved out for Kajol, but due to her personal problems she could not do it. Therefore I had to use Rani. If Kajol was in the movie, the conservative Indian audience could have easily figured out the age gap (between Abhi and Kajol)." ---- Good!!! That finally explains why there should have been any marital woes facing the couple. Phew!! at least something about the movie makes sense.


Still I must say :

  1. I hate your movies Karan.
  2. I hate your movies Shahrukh.
  3. I hate your movies Amitabh .. No actually I hate everything about you , Amitabh (except maybe your daughter-in-law to-be). (Coming Soon)
  4. Rani, work out.
  5. Kajol, stop shaking your booty.
  6. Sexy Sam Sexy Sam Bang Bang Bang Bang you Sam !!! : Are NOT, definitely NOT, cool lyrics.Strength :
  7. The only movie in which AB (Abhi, Amitabh CANT act) acted well. BTW, he acted like a retard in Guru. (Insnt that Hidthicks domain???)
  8. Awesome marketing, courtsey Sony : The movie was telecasted the day right after India vs Bangladesh. I would have seen even a Britney and Christina live concert that day. (Ofcourse, that should have been jam-packed with smooches).

1 comments Thursday, March 15, 2007

Well again, this one was not queued up. Apologies for that.

@
zen babu I might not owe my sense of humour entirely to u, but its definitely not the same for the feminist-in-me.

@ Anti-feminist 1 : If u think feminists are men-hating lesbians ... Wake up.
@ Anti-feminist 2 : If u think feminists are
ugly girls who are jealous of their more female counterparts.. Go talk to the Hottest Female, u know, about this maybe she can help you cut the crap.



I was just reading some of the blogs @
blanknoise wondering why, as a society, do we go so wrong ( I choose to not plunge into the History aspect of male chauvinism, will cover that some other time ).

This is about the time when I was around probably 10 years old, a carefree, fun loving kid. I lived in a multi-storied building (Needless to say it had a lift). Now this building happened to entirely occupied by Sarkaari Babus and it was all like a family the everyone-knows-everyone types.

Obviously everyone uses the lift like 20 times a day. It was big enough to accommodate 8-10 people. In one such lift-journey I was going down with a female-friend(N) to play. The journey lasted for about 20seconds(3rd floor to ground floor). Suddenly after stepping out of the lift N started crying inconsolably. I was flummoxed "Kya hua!!! Did you hurt yourself or something??? Kya hua yaar!!"

After a lot of eavesdropping (I am SORRY for that), I learnt that "the majdoor, he was with us in the lift, had done something to N". What that was that "something" I did not understand. Later I did take some friends into confidence to know what, exactly, had happened(I dint want the explicit details).

Today, it is not tough for me to understand the "What".

I do appreciate and respect, the reasons behind their keeping the whole incident under wraps. It is undoubtedly, impossible for me to put myself in place of the girl and understand what she went through. Yet, I must add, had I known the "What" 10 years ago I may have been a lot more cautious, may have prevented some of these incidents from happening, may have appreciated these issues better, may have...

It is essential to involve your brothers and other close friends and to let them know about such incidences. Believe me, it does make a difference.

6 comments Saturday, March 10, 2007

What am I writing?


I know there are 2 posts already Queued up, I also know that no one has started reading the posts so it doesn't make a god damn difference.

So here I come with the first Baba Bashing.

Of course this one is sans the moustache and Dadi.

So, tell me what do u do when u see a blessed person with divine powers sitting in front of u????Well naturally u would want to go and touch his/her feet. But to your dismay u realise that you cant possibly do that. Why? Apart from the fact that there are always, like 500, people already waiting to do that. But here it seems to be slightly different.
This is probably one of the only worthwhile forwards that I have ever got :
These pictures I am sending you all shows the gross disrespect and insult to the Indian National flag by this so called "spiritual leader" and self proclaimed "GOD" Mataji Nirmala Devi. This disrespect to our country's flag shows that she has definitely no respect or love for the country that gave her so much and her husband who was an IAS officer and chief of the SCI (he is seated next to her in the pics). Such a shame. I do urge and plead with all Indians who deeply love their country to forward the photos to as many people as possible so that it does catch the eye of someone higher up in the Indian Govt who can really take some action against this cult.

I know I do not have any means to prove it nor do i have any Chashmaddet Gava. Yet I have all the reason to believe this.

If any of you is acquainted with the law regarding the National Flag I would want to know exactly what classifies as a crime and what doesn't.

I have forwarded this link to many news channels and news papers, hope to see some action.

0 comments Wednesday, March 7, 2007

Kya nahin milega:

Random Hypothetical Stories and the kind of i-ll-type-down-all-that-i-do-everyday.

Shayri and Poem of the kind ohh-i-have-soo-much-talent-but-unfortunately-cant-become-famous-so-lets-blog-it.

Roona-Dhoona. My GF left me so i have started to blog. (Waise Dhoona to milega)

The kinda blogs where i will bash every celeb and politician for anything and everything including the fact that he is born human.People..... Ahh I soo love it.... But Naah!! Not again, that to over a blog, BAAD IDEA.

Kya milega:

  1. Sach!!!Sirf Sach. That sounds like Aaj Tak. Probably call that Bhaiyya News.
  2. Mumma Bashing. Yes She will spank every celeb for adopting cheap tactics to get famous.
  3. Reviews: Movie, News sab latest gupshup, filtered.
  4. Hell-ivation Gyan: How to save yourself from the changuls of corrupt babas and the inside stories.
  5. Some theories that will be beyond most of u reading this blog (they wont be necessarily right ), for ur convenience, I shall mark them appropriately.
  6. Random PJs or GCs (Garib Chutkule) scattered evenly all over.

Other than this most of the stories should revolve around:

  1. MCPs -Male Chauvinist Pigs, Need i say more??
  2. FCBs(Female Chauvinist Bitches) : DO NOT (i repeat DO NOT) confuse them with feminists. This refers to everyone who believes that every man at every point of time is looking for avenues to bone women. Yes, this species is not a nuisance at public places, but one occasionally finds them blogging and condemning men for things like breathing or probably even existing.
  3. Conservative Extremists: Evangelists and other Hindu Muslims organisations
  4. Babas with lotsa Dadi Muuch and Stupid Jabber.
  5. Lotsa more random shit around me: Which by the way varies exponentially with distance between a person and the closest IT industry.

USP: This blog is about as much of just-another-blog as Ranamujam was just-another-Mathematician

0 comments

Naam: Bhaiyya Blogger

Maa ka Naam ( I am a feminist after-all) : Mumma Blogger

Baap ka Naam : Papa Blogger

Kiss khet ki muli hun:
Born in UP. Brought up in UP, Delhi, Mumbai, Vadodara, Chennai

Kiss Kiss ghat ka asar hai:
Largely influenced by -

  1. U.P. - Yahaan ka khoon hai meri ragon mein. Not much of a typical bhaiyya, but affectionately called "lala" by some relatives.
  2. Dilli (= Punjabi + Bihari + Dilli) - Spent a major chunk of mah life here. Totally love this place.
  3. Amreekii Culture - Yes. All u RSS and Shiv Seniks can throw brickbats at MTV, V, Star Movies for ruining the Indian youth and write stories about the conspiracy by the west to take over India, whatever makes u think I care.

Language: This Blog will largely be in Hinglish with a few Gujarati and Tamil Words yahaan-vahaan.

Present Status: IT engineer working for a leading software firm. This obviously implies u have to bear with my 0 creativity, a sense of humour that is entirely borrowed from the Net that Ctrl-C then Ctrl-V.

Disclaimer : This is a personal blog and does not necessarily reflect the views of the Author. Also, this DOES NOT have any legal validity.