4 comments Monday, April 30, 2007

I don’t understand my folks??

They will want me to marry an educated, smart , padhi-likkhi, independent girl.

What the hell yaar. We all know that an independent people are more likely to have affairs when they are young, and of-course if she could have had an affair when she was young she will have extra-marital affairs after marriage. Seriously if she had an affair in her teens she could very well be a professional slut. How will I ever be able to live with such a characterless bitch?

Anyway, my strong cosmic-link with sindhi babes (SB) is well known, so why not marry someone from here.

Its pretty simple, PICTURE THIS:

Matri Ad:

MATCH 4 95/5’ 5’’ BE BOY, Match shld be Bful, Gori, Slim, Homely, Edu. The Boy can be a humongous Orangutan, but the bride has got to be Gori/Slim.

Then:

BB marries SB

Obviously I don’t have to care about being faithful to her. Dare she question my integrity, I can always beat the living hell out of her.

Then ofcourse we ll have kids: a daughter, Phoolmati , and a son , Sindhi Dude (SD). SD will attend the boys school mentioned in the link above and Phoolmati will, obviously, faithfully follow her mothers footsteps.

I will instill in her our cultural values. I will tell her to shift her line-of-sight by 90 degrees if any guy ogles at her. If any guys gropes her in public, she will quietly ignore him else her sanctity will be lost and she will become "used". So it makes complete sense to keep quiet.


................ And the Cycle Continues...................

GROSS.

0 comments Friday, April 13, 2007

Imagine that one wishes to enter a local lottery along with thousands of other participants. It is immediately recognizable that the chance of one's ticket losing is so high that one is justified in believing that it will not win. Probability seems to confirm the justification for such a belief. Yet, it is not just one's individually purchased ticket that has such a high probability of losing, but any ticket that has been bought in a fair lottery. Furthermore, since one seems justified in believing that each individual ticket will not win, one also seems justified in believing that the conjunction of all tickets, or that every ticket, will not win.<HUH?????, if all have low probablity then all put together have low probablity too????> Yet at the same time, one must also remember that in all lotteries there is the slight probability that a ticket will win. After all, there is often one winner. How, therefore, can one be justified in believing that every ticket will not win, but that one ticket will win?

Original article here.

Kya bakwaas ......

I would rather call it Botox than Paradox... (OK, I am going to have coffee)

7 comments Saturday, April 7, 2007

Why is it that daddajis gyan, more often than not, contradicts any form of teeny-meeny bit of common sense. Seriously yaar, was it like a secret conspiracy of those old men sitting on a cot. Picture this village scene….


Chiraunjilal : Arre Bhai!! Kuch karne ko hi nahi hai !! Saale Benjamin Franklin electricity bhi invent nahin ki (Yeh, our ancestors could see the future)!!Bore ho rahe hain!Kuch masti karte hain yaar! {We are getting bored lets do something}


Gajodhar : Chalo yaar, aane vaali generation ki lagate hain { Lets create a mess for the coming generation}

Chiraunjilal : Aree Gajodhar bhadiya idea hai !! Chalo yaar koi nai “Ancient Therapy” banate hain..{lets make a new Ancient therapy}

Gajodhar: Gajaab Idea diye ho re!!! Majaa aai gava re {Great idea}


The Chinese Equivalent…..


YO: Chin chaun Chuinnn !! kyn Phun

HU: What the hell is he sayin???? Lets come up with Acupressure atleast that ll keep his trap shut for sometime..



Case Study:

Consider a 21 Year old Fit guy. (by fit I mean something like a health freak.).

1 year ago he had a perfect vision. Around that time he joined an IT company.

Now he has a slight eye power and he wants to get that cured.



What could have been the cause of the Eye Power???













































Cmmon...

You dont need to netwon to put this in place..

























“IT industry” therefore “spent a lot of time in front of the computer screen” therefore “poor eye-sight”…………………………..Right????




Obviously yaar, I mean Jacking off doesnt effect ones eye-sight or looking at good chicks doesnt make one go blind (uska badla to agle janam mein dega) or making love makes one go blind..


Or doesn’t it???


Actually that’s what Mr. Acupressure said.


Surprised…..So was I.


I am not challenging the curing power of these “ancient therapies” but I just don’t understand why do the "docs" supplement them with stuff like:

There is a Hole in your head where the cosmic forces converge.
And
I can send energy all the way to Canada.



Not only does it sound implausible, but it is such a turn off for the prospective patients who have some bit of intelligence..


OK.. now I cant figure out how to end this blog..


So bbye..neend aa rahi ha…